Power Action Examples
Example #1:
Kid: “But she’s annoying me!”
Caregiver: “Well, what are your choices? You can say to her, please stop kicking my chair; it’s annoying.? Or you can walk away. Which do you think is better?”
Power Action Examples
Example #2:
A child is eating lunch, and you tell him it’s time to clean up. He forcefully yells, “But I can’t carry this all by myself!!”
You guide him: “Then you say – I need some help, please.”
The kid repeats: “I need help, please.”
Praise the child by saying: “That’s great asking. Of course I’ll help.”
Blocking: Blocking is a very powerful tool for your toolbox. Sometimes kids get fixated on what they want to do and, for the life of them, can’t get their brains headed in a different direction. So you put your body in front of them and block the action. You don’t grab, you don’t talk, and you don’t get ticked off. You simply use your body as a deterrent.
Example #1:
An obsessive compulsive child fixates on turning off the lights when he leaves the classroom. You turn the lights back on. He rushes back to turn them off again. Use your body to block the light switch.
Example #2:
Your kid is dead set on a snack cake for an afternoon nibble. You say no. She doesn’t like your answer and goes to the cabinet to get a snack cake. Step in front of the cabinet and block her. Put your arms out to the side if necessary. Don’t let her reach around you. This is not a game, this is not a lecture, and you need to keep your emotions in a bottle .
Stay silent and block. (And by the way, if your kid is this obstinate about something as benign as a snack cake, we need to have a serious talk! Get some control and respect back in that house, my friend. Now.)
Example #3:
After speech therapy, my kids are allowed a single stamp on their hands. One child insists on three and rushes in to get them. So I quickly take the ink and stamps, put them behind me, and block. In this case, it‘s usually as simple as that, and the kid straightens up quick.
Kids only do this because they’ve gotten away with the behavior before. A teacher or parent says one thing, the kid wants to do another, so they do it quick as lightening before the adult has time to stop them.
For this example, you might think, it’s a stamp. . . so what? But it is a big deal. The child is running you over to do what they want. To heck with your rules! I’m gonna do it anyway!
We cannot let kids call the shots like that. It leads to other, more aggressive behavior. First they want the stamp. Then they want potato chips for dinner. Then they walk off and ignore you when you try to discipline. Then they throw a fit because you won’t buy them something.
It wears you down and one day you wake up in tears with a hateful, defiant child living with you and think, “What on earth happened?” So stop it at the stamp!