So now we know that we have to TELL and SHOW our kids how we want them to act. And sometimes they need help. The first way we promote positive behavior is by giving better direction using Task Analysis and Prompting. This approach breaks activities into manageable steps so they are not so overwhelming. This decreases frustration. When a task is overwhelming, overload kicks in. Makes sense, right?
Now, you would think that you only have to break down tasks for the little bitty kids, right? Wrong. Even as kids get older, they need direction. We just assume they should know what we’re talking about, so we yell, “Are you kidding. Put that thing right there so it will stay upright!” All the while they’re trying to figure out what ‘that’ is and where ‘there’ is and getting flustered because you’re yelling.
We have to break steps down into parts. We have to use language kids understand and be specific. “That” is a pitcher of lemonade and “there” is on a flat surface so it won’t topple over. And not only do we have to break it down better, we need to give our kids prompts.
Task Analysis and Prompting
Prompting is any assistance given by a caregiver to promote correct responding. Good prompting increases the likelihood that your child will do what you want or ask. We do it every day without even thinking:
- Holding your hand out to show your child to take it.
- Saying, “Put your foot here,” while helping them put on a roller-blade.
- Touching their back to prompt them forward.
- Patting a surface to indicate they should sit.
Prompts are instructions, gestures, demonstrations, touches, or other things we arrange or do to help children make the correct responses. There are five types of prompts: verbal, modeling, gesture, physical, and visual.
Verbal
Verbal prompts are words, instructions, or questions meant to direct a child to do something. Important: Verbal prompts are the least effective! This is why parents get so frustrated with kids; there are too many verbal prompts given the wrong way. We talk too much! Too many steps, too much direction, or constant yammering only confuses the poor kids.
For example, when getting dressed, the parent will yak: “Put on your shirt. Take those pants off, they don’t match. Put the blue ones on instead. Put on these socks. No, stop that, I said the blue ones!” As kids get older, they can process multiple steps, but we mix it up too much and it gets confusing. Then the directions become too much information to process.
Here are some examples of verbal prompts: (Please note, the first three are not good or bad. They are just examples of how we use verbal prompts on a daily basis.)
“Do you want to eat?”
“Let go of the book.”
“Hold still.”
“I told you to stop that!” (This prompt is not specific and does not work. Unfortunately, we do it all the time!)
Modeling
Modeling demonstrates a response. It is generally used in conjunction with other prompts.
Examples:
Saying, “Do you want to eat?” as you act out eating. (modeling + verbal)
Saying, “Open the door” as you open the door for the child. (modeling + verbal)
Gesture
Gesture prompts indicate an action to be performed by pointing, motioning, or nodding toward the child, objects, materials, or activities. Gesture prompts are also often used with other prompts.
Examples:
Saying, “Do you want to eat?” and pointing to a sandwich. (gesture + verbal)
Saying, “Open the door” while pointing to the door. (gesture + verbal)
Physical
Physical prompts are physical contacts from a caregiver that demonstrate what they want. (When you give physical prompts, you walk the child through the activity.) Such prompts include hand over hand, escorting, hand on shoulder, hand on elbow, hand on wrist, or any other touch. Physical prompts require the most hands-on help, but research indicates that these prompts work the best.
Examples:
- You’re trying to de-escalate an argument between two kids. One is talking and the other tries to interrupt. You gently put your hand on kid #2’s shoulder as a cue to stop talking while you first get the story from kid #1.
- “Here’s how you fold the towel.” To show how to fold a towel, you take the child’s hands and guide him through actually folding the towel.
Visual
Visual prompts include written words, pictures, objects, people and places. You see these all over the place. For example, as kids begin to learn math, they use worksheets with pictures of animals or blocks. The pictures get them to understand the concept of sorting, counting by tens, addition, etc. Or you’re supposed to remember to tell a friend about a book you read and, as soon as you see them, it pops into your head. Seeing the friend was your visual cue. Or your kid wants to go outside, but they haven’t finished their homework. So you don’t say a word, but hold up their math book. That visual cue reminds them to do their homework.
Other examples:
Putting an index finger to your lips to indicate a child should be quiet.
Furrowing your brow and giving eye contact to indicate a child should stop a behavior.
Here are some resources to consider.
Using Prompts
Kids require prompting all the time. We just usually do it wrong and then immediately get furious when we get an unwanted response. Study the different prompts. Try to stop using so many verbal prompts. Start using more physical prompts and modeling for difficult activities. This takes more time and effort up front, but the decrease in frustration is great.